


Purification

by Lise



Series: Gehenna [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: (but only in the loosest of ways this is not a healthy dom/sub relationship okay), BAMF Natasha, Consensual But Not Safe Or Sane, Cunnilingus, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub, Electricity, F/M, Floor Sex, Humiliation, Imagined Violence, Loki Has Issues, Major Issues, Multiple Orgasms, Natasha does what she wants for her own reasons, Painful Sex, Pegging, Really Fucked Up Relationships, Rough Sex, Sexual Content, Vibrators, Violence, Woman Really On Top, Woman on Top, fucked out, let's see how many kinks I can get in here how about it, the author is a little bit sorry, this got kind of...something, we shall never speak of this again, writing portions of this on the plane with someone looking over my shoulder was interesting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-06
Updated: 2013-08-06
Packaged: 2017-12-22 14:35:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/914344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lise/pseuds/Lise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes he wants to be bled dry. </p>
<p>(Or, the one where Loki and Natasha have a thing. It's not quite hatred. It's definitely complicated.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Purification

**Author's Note:**

> So I knew I wanted to write more Loki/Natasha hideously messy fucked up porn. Because I like fucking Loki up, and I like Natasha pwning peoples' asses. Two birds, one stone! And then I was thinking about this verse-like thing and about how I would like to know what was going on in Loki's head, cause that's always a good time. 
> 
> And then this happened. 
> 
> I'm not sure if I should apologize or not.

The flat truth was that he never should have gone to her in the first place. 

However he’d felt at the time, however sickeningly _desperate_ he’d been, he should not have gone to her. Or at least should have killed her then. He still wasn’t quite certain why he hadn’t. It had been his intention; it was just as though she’d somehow sucked everything out of him, even the will to do that. Wrung him dry and left him empty and clean but also…hollow. 

It was too easy to get addicted to that feeling. 

Which was why he was here again. But this time… _it’s not going to be different,_ the thought whispered into the back of his mind. _You know it won’t be. You know why you’re here and it’s not to kill her._

He could make as many excuses as he liked, about it being a waste to do away with such a masterpiece, about a debt owed, about it being more entertaining to watch her compromise everything she supposedly stood for, but he knew the truth, deep within, that he wanted what she gave him. No, not wanted. Needed. _Craved._ Because he was _weak._

That was truth.

He sat down at her table and waited, fingers folded in front of him. 

She didn’t keep him waiting so long. The door opened and she stepped in, and then noticed him. No reaction showed on her face, and she turned to close the door, showing her back without a sign of worry about doing so, a near dismissal that made anger twist under his skin (but something else, too). She unzipped her jacket and hung it on the coat rack by the door, and only then turned to look at him again.

“You again,” the Widow said flatly. Loki gave her a slender smile, keeping himself still.

“Are you surprised?” 

“I wish I were.” Her gaze didn’t waver. Loki felt the urge to twitch, something twisting in his gut. Her sheer coldness reached into him and tugged at his entrails. She would have the same look on her face, he imagined, killing him, and a frisson went through him like a spirit’s finger down his spine. He cocked his head deliberately, and widened his eyes. 

“Didn’t I tell you that we were not finished?” 

Her expression didn’t shift, just regarding him almost with disinterest. “We are if I say we are. I told you. I’m not your confessor.” _You could be,_ something in Loki whined. _I want you to be, I want you to break me open, peel flesh from bone, crack the bone and suck out the marrow until I’m empty-_ He felt sick at himself, vicious inward pointing hatred tearing at his insides. She raised her eyebrows, the gesture delicate but sharp-edged. “Or do you think I find you so irresistible?” 

He found a slender smile. “I think you are tempted.” He let the smile twist a little toward smug. “I remember how wet you were for me. You like to feel powerful. You like to dole out pain. You _miss_ the blood on your hands-”

“If I spill your blood again it’ll be to cut your throat,” she said, without feeling, and Loki felt himself shudder, imagining her delicate hand dragging his head back by the hair, the bite of cold steel quickly warmed by a flood of hot arterial blood. There was a stirring in his groin and he wanted to sink to his knees and beg for her cunt, his body hot and coiled tight. He bared his teeth. 

“Why don’t you, then?”

She smiled thinly at him. “You’d like it too much.” An electric chill ran down his spine and Loki kept his breath even with an effort. She cocked her head to the side. “And it’d be too easy for you. I’d rather watch you squirm in the knowledge that you’re desperate enough for debasement to come crawling to me, when you know exactly how little I care.” 

He hated her. He hated her, he wanted to lock his hands around her neck and choke the life from her, and underneath wanted even more to roll over like a whipped dog and whine for her touch. 

The Widow smirked, slightly. “You’ve got it bad, don’t you? Someone should have snapped a leash and collar on you years ago. Saved us all the trouble.” Shame and desire warred nauseously in his stomach. He could see it, vividly, kneeling at her side, her hands pulling him in by the leather band around his throat to shove his face between her legs, no quarter, no mercy or kindness or-

Loki took a sharp breath through his nose and spread his hands, donning a mocking smile. “You have the chance to do so now, do you not?” 

“I don’t need to put you on a leash. I could snap my fingers and you’d do anything I asked as long as I let you touch me.” Her smile was elegant, cruel. “I don’t need anything from you, and you need _everything_ from me.”

Loki bared his teeth and took a sharp step toward her, fury welling up hot and fast, and stopped when she held up a hand. 

“You’re losing your touch,” she said, eyes on him flat, almost bored. “I didn’t actually say no.”

He quivered, staring at her. His breathing quickened. After a moment, she paced across the room and opened one of the drawers, pulled out a little box and set it down to his left. Loki looked from it to her, something fluttering rapidly in his stomach. “Put it on,” she said. “And then we can talk about terms.”

“I thought you didn’t need a leash.” He kept his voice even with an effort.

“It’s not a leash.” She stepped back with another gesture, and he opened the box, keeping his movements smooth, casual. It wasn’t a leash. Just a thin chain of delicate silver without pendant or marking. The clasp was simple as well. Delicate work.

“That’s mine,” She said. “If you put it on, it’ll still be mine.” She nodded at the slender chain. “Consider it a reminder.”

Loki felt a low thrill, somewhere deep inside him. “Of?” he said, deliberately casually, and she leveled a gaze on him that said she was well aware that he knew. A thin silver chain that belonged to her. He could break it without much effort. 

He already knew he wouldn’t. 

His hands felt heavy, though, lifting the chain and opening the clasp. He could feel her watching him and deliberately did not glance sideways. Some corner of his mind raged at him for taking this, for debasing himself like some kind of common _whore_ -

She was making him choose this, as she had before. Knowing exactly how bitter the humiliation of doing so would be for him to swallow. 

It was the kind of intimate cruelty that made his body clench and his loins ache. 

He closed the necklace around his neck. “Terms?” he said, quietly, keeping his voice level. He would not let her see – (she already knew, perfectly well). Romanova held up a hand and ticked them off. 

“Simple. One, you step out of line and the deal’s off. I won’t kill you, in that case. I’ll just leave you to SHIELD.” Her eyes bored into him, near impossible to read. “Two: after this – you don’t turn up in my house. I’ll give you a number you can use. If you come back here without my permission, deal’s off.” Simple enough. Loki made himself nod. “Third. My game, my rules.” She gave him a tight smile. “I figure that’s not a problem for you.”

He felt himself shudder. “If I wanted to be coddled I wouldn’t have come to you,” he said, and if the words came out even enough, the undertone of _need_ seemed so rankly obvious that it made him sick at himself. He could feel the chain, slender as it was, pressing against his neck.

“Glad to hear it.” She eyed him, up and down, her expression still cool. He felt an itch down his spine, wanting to break the silence, to do _something,_ and then she shifted very slightly. “Come here.”

He gave her a smile, almost playful. “Or what?” 

“Or nothing,” she said, easily. “I have plenty of other things I can do instead of playing your little game.” He shivered a little, kept himself from swallowing. Her smile was delicate and cruel. “Don’t get any ideas that it’s otherwise. Come here.” 

He went. Almost wanted to just slide to his knees and bury his nose in her cunt, inhale the musk-sweat smell of her body, beg for the privilege of touching her, of making her come- 

Her hand flashed out and grabbed a handful of his hair, dragged his head back, and he just felt the faint whisper of steel at his bared throat. His heart jumped, but it was arousal that made his knees weak. “After all that?” he managed to murmur, but could hear the strain in his own voice. 

“I really would’ve thought you’d try harder,” the Widow said, her voice like silk. “But you’re happy to crawl on your knees for me without even pretending you don’t want it. How long have you been waiting for someone to do this to you?” Hate was a sour, tight knot in his belly, but not as strong as the well of yearning, of _yes yes yes._ The knife pressed just a little, and he felt a single layer of skin break, could almost see the thin red line across his throat. Loki sucked in a breath, body pulsing with something so intense that it was almost agony. “Down,” she said, and he dropped almost without thinking.

She stepped forward and he tilted his head back, met her eyes with his blood thundering in his veins. “I wouldn’t want you to think twice about what you’re doing,” he said, the words flowing off his tongue. “I am hardly the only one _compromised_ here, Agent Romanova-”

The motion was almost too quick to see, and his head snapped to the side, face stinging. It wasn’t even a particularly hard slap, just enough to make his skin warm slightly, and a humiliating part of his brain supplied the image eagerly of her bending him over with her small hands and leaving hot red skin down the backs of his thighs. 

He couldn’t keep back a snarl, more for himself than for her, and snapped his head back to look at her, but she didn’t look in the least impressed. “If you think I’m going to put up with you trying to provoke me,” she said, “You’re wrong. You know how this works.” 

“Do I?” 

“You’re the one in need, Loki.” His stomach twisted at the tone in her voice, too soft, malevolent in its seeming kindness. “So you tell me. What are you after?” She reached out and her fingers ran into his hair, but not with violence, this time. Gentle. _Perversely._ Loki shut his eyes and bit his lip until the skin broke and he tasted blood. 

“You are cruel,” he murmured, but despite his effort it came out full of something like longing, but she was so close, and he leaned in, reached to slide his fingers up the zipper of her pants. 

She grabbed his wrist and dug her nail in between the tendons. “Did I say you could touch me?” she said, and for the first time he heard a tremor of something in her voice and felt it flush through his body like a current. Pain spidered up his arm, but far from what he couldn’t take.

“Then let me touch you,” he said, the words slipping from his throat. “Let me…” His voice broke off as her foot lifted and landed lightly on his crotch, kneading just enough to make his body ache and strain against that pressure. 

She pulled away a moment later, though, stepped back and began to strip out of her clothing with perfunctory efficiency. He let his eyes wander as she did so. Her body was a weapon in itself and she kept it tuned like one; her waist and hips formed a feminine curve but it was all sleek muscle underneath. 

She stepped out of her pants and paused, her eyebrows lifting when she noticed him looking. He summoned a smirk, let it be touched with just the faintest edge of lecherous satisfaction. 

She just seemed amused, and stepped back toward him, more prowl than pace. “You want to touch me?” She said, and stopped, just out of reach. “Earn your keep, is that the idea?” Romanova moved like a snake, quick and sharp, her fingers catching one of his nipples and twisting. He felt it all the way down and moved his own hands to her buttocks, equally quickly, fingers digging into muscle as he pressed his nose at the apex of her legs and inhaled. Her fingers wrapped around the back of his head and Loki heard her take a sharp breath. 

_I’m not the only one here,_ he thought, viciously. _I can make you feel as well as,_ but that was a lie, and that was why he was here. 

Loki mouthed at her underclothes, could smell her through the thin fabric, sweat and the subtler female smell. “Or is this you pretending to be in control?” she said, and despite the pressure of her fingers her voice hadn’t changed at all. “Pretending you even _want_ to be?” Her words sunk in under his skin, burrowing like insects where he couldn’t scratch them out. She pushed his head back and used the other hand to push that last scrap of cloth off her hips, and looked down at him, imperious and cold. “Well?” 

She knew him now. Had him in a snare he’d set for himself. Want was tight in his stomach and Loki moved smoothly, bringing his hands up to draw her outer lips apart, letting his tongue slide into her folds in one long, caressing stroke, like he was her lover. 

“Ah-!” Her startled exclamation went straight to Loki’s cock but also made a giddy part of him leap like an excited dog, _she’s pleased, she likes,_ and he pretended it was the first that made him repeat the motion, slower, and then moved his head and stiffened the tip of his tongue to dip it into her. Her right leg lifted and hooked over his shoulder, pushing his mouth and nose deeper between her legs and he could taste her growing arousal wetting his tongue. He moved his hands to hold her hips and let the thrust of his tongue fuck a little deeper. “Unn. Maybe if you’re really _good_ – and if you still have it in you when I’m done – I’ll let you fuck me. You weren’t _that_ bad the first time – do you even want that, though? Seemed to me you preferred the other way around-” Humiliation burned hot in his gut. She dug her nails into his skin and pulled until every protective layer he’d erected was flayed away and he was bleeding, naked flesh, and all he could do was _love_ her for it. 

Loki pushed his tongue against her again, licked around where he knew her clitoris was, nudged up just under it and felt her muscles clench, slick wet sliding down over his chin. Her heel dug into his back, her hips rocking. His cock was aching between his legs and if he pulled back he wouldn’t be able to refrain from begging her to touch him and he would cling to a few small things still-

(For now. All he had done with her thus far was give ground and give ground and give-)

Her hand tangled in his hair and dragged him harder against her. “Put your neck into it,” she said, and he could just hear a slight note of breathlessness in her voice and obeyed, lips and tongue working against her until he found that hard little nub of flesh and flicked his tongue against it.

She made a sharp noise and his fingers yanked in his hair; he tasted a fresh surge of wetness flooding his tongue and flattened it to flutter against her clitoris. Her hips bucked into his face and he felt a little flush of victory. He hummed softly, heard her make a sound, but then her foot was grinding down against him and it felt like his body was going to split open. 

_She’s going to break you._ The thought slid into the back of his mind, and he couldn’t care, almost longed for it. _What a thousand years of pain couldn’t do, and you’ll grovel at her feet-_

Her foot pulled away and he let out a helpless sound, hips arching in want of friction. “You want that back?” she said, voice low and merciless. “Better work harder, I’ve had better using my own hand-”

Loki wanted to snarl. He wanted to bite down and taste her blood and feel her writhe in pain but he wanted still more desperately to please her. He pushed his mouth harder against her, craned his neck to adjust angles, working lips and tongue almost frantically. His pulse was throbbing like an open wound, and he almost couldn’t breathe for how deeply his nose was buried in the folds of her, sliding in her slick arousal, drowning in the hot wet places of her body. She was riding him now, grinding against his face, and he dared, just once, to let his teeth brush her clit.

He tasted her coming in a flood of wet on his face, his tongue, and the way her body spasmed, her leg around his neck pushing him deeper still between her legs. He let his tongue slip out and fuck into her once, twice, before she unwound herself and pushed him back with a foot to his chest. 

Loki let himself fall back and caught himself on his hands, breathing hard. He gave her a smile, insolent and a little wild. 

“The way you get so _deliciously_ wet for me suggests otherwise than you would cla- aaah,” he stopped as she moved, one foot resting on the bulge in his pants, not quite pressing down, but threatening. A moment later she dropped to a crouch over him. He moved his hands up to her waist and she grabbed one and bit hard at the web between thumb and forefinger. He gasped, sharply; when she released him he let his hands fall away. Her eyes staring down at him were intent, pinioning him to the floor. 

“Let me tell you how this is going to go,” she said, and Loki felt his blood heat. “You’re going to strip off every single item of clothing you’re wearing. Then I’m going to put on a strap on and fuck you into my floor, because I don’t want you on my bed.” Loki’s breathing picked up, despite his attempts to contain it. “And then I’m going to do it again. Until you’re a panting, ruined _wreck_ on my floor. How’s that sound?” 

Loki didn’t want to know what his face looked like. Didn’t want to know how obvious it was that every word she said made his whole body throb, the promise in her voice making him want to whine. “I think,” he forced out. “I think – I can say I wouldn’t mind that.” 

“Glad to hear it,” she said, “But I don’t remember saying that I was _asking._ ” She stepped back. “I’ll be right back. I expect you to be naked when I am.”

“Yes, mistress,” he said, because he knew it would anger her, and bit back a yell when her fingernail bit into a nerve at the base of his neck before she rose and sashayed away. 

His hands felt clumsy as he unbuckled his own overcoat and shed it, followed by the rest a layer at a time. He almost moaned when his fingers brushed his aching cock while unlacing his breeches, glanced toward the hallway and took himself in hand, letting his eyes drift closed as his fingers begin to stroke-

“Hands off.” He fell still, the note in her voice like ice water tracing his spine in contrast with heat pooling in his belly. He opened his eyes and looked toward her, felt again that little tug at the way she looked with the hard false cock between her legs that should have been absurd but just made his mouth water. She walked over, the motion all graceful prowl. “Do I need to repeat myself?” 

She drew in close. Loki let his hand fall away and gave her an insolent smile. “If you’re going to take your time…”

Her hand flashed out and his body jerked, mouth opening soundlessly as she twisted one of his nipples ruthlessly. “That chain you’re wearing. Remember whose it is?” 

He was going to burn up from the inside. There would be nothing left, just ash, and he would be the only one to blame, because he’d given this to her. Given _himself_ to her. “Yours,” he bit out, and her nail bit into the tender bud of flesh until he couldn’t hold in a shuddering gasp. 

“So long as you’re clear,” she said, deadly cold, and then released him, leaving a deep ache that was just making his cock throb more viciously. “Get down. Hands and knees. Don’t pretend you want to make this hard.” 

Lost. Hopelessly, completely, lost, and he had been since he’d first let her give him what he wanted. 

He folded to hands and knees and felt her behind him. She ground her false cock against his ass and he couldn’t help but push back into it. Her hand slid over his hip and brushed against his cock, only to pull away and move to push his shoulders down, leaving his hips canted up at an obscene angle, bent over like a whore. Her fingers danced over his asshole, tapping once, circling, but no more. _Just fuck me,_ he wanted to snarl, _just drive your cock into me and make me bleed-_

Loki felt his body quiver, just the smallest of sounds escaping him.

Her hand landed lightly on his back. “Look at you,” she murmured. “How do you want it, hm? Fast and hard and brutal, or would you rather I took it slow, pretended to care, until you snapped and _screamed_ for me to hurt you?”

Damn her. _Damn_ her. “You think – you could make me scream?” 

“Oh,” she said, voice full of promise. “I do.” He held in a whine, clamped his lips together for a moment. 

“How do you intend to do- nnh.” She ground the hard plastic of her cock against his ass. He remembered how it had felt inside him, splitting him in two with unforgiving lack of give, the merciless way it had dragged over his prostate, the knowledge with every rough thrust that he was letting a fragile mortal woman tear him apart and the humiliation of _wanting_ it just making him harder-

He panted, and tried to force his breath to even. She heard it, of course, and he felt her thumb press against his hole. “Hoping I’m going to make it a little easier this time?” she murmured, and he felt his breathing quicken at the quiet scorn in her voice. “I did make it a little slick. So I can fuck you harder. And longer. Because I’m going to take you until you come dry or pass out, whichever comes first.” 

Loki couldn’t hold in a small, helpless, shameful sound. His cock throbbed between his legs. _Please yes that sounds-_

She lined up her cock and thrust into him like a knife into flesh. He bit down on his own wrist to keep back a cry, body suddenly achingly full and his insides burning for the drag along tender flesh. Her hips rolled against him and he _felt_ the stiffness of the false cock inside him stir his entrails and his body bucked, wrenched, agony shading toward pleasure or maybe both at once. He took three harsh breaths, trying to control the trembling of his body. 

“What do you think,” she murmured. “Could I make you come just like this?” Muscle clenched and relaxed, clenched and relaxed, and he still couldn’t draw in a full breath, and then she was moving. He sucked in something that wanted to become a howl, feeling the slide- _drag_ of her along every inch of his intestines, tender flesh on fire and he wanted more, he wanted her to rip him apart and leave him a bleeding _wreck-_

His hands clenched on the carpet, but there was nothing to grab onto. Her hands were light on his back in perfect contrast to the rough way she was using him. “Ah – if you think you can-”

She thrust in again, one long smooth push all the way to the hilt and his voice broke, his thoughts broke. His cock jerked between his legs and he gasped, breathless, felt the hard plastic punch against the sensitive spot inside of him through his whole body. His legs shook, and he heard himself make a sound like a strangled whimper. 

“Does anyone else know how much you _love_ this? Or is it just me?” She ground her hips against him, and he felt his whole body heat, hate and shame tangling together and turning into more arousal. “Was this a thing, before, you know, or is this part of the whole deal where you just _desperately_ want someone to notice you-”

A sound escaped his throat somewhere between fury and need, and she moved again, hips pistoning in-out, and his body arched for more, every part of him quivering. “What was that?” she asked, almost sweetly. “I’m genuinely curious. Maybe if Thor’d just given you a good spanking in the first place-”

_Don’t mention Thor,_ he should have said, _don’t ever,_ but he hadn’t, and he felt his whole body flush, his cock give a twitch even as nausea surged in his throat. She moved her hips in a shallow little thrust that rubbed across his prostate, and he heard himself whine, low and thin. 

“You know,” she said, almost conversational, though he could hear her breathing just a little hard. “I’ve changed my mind. It’s worth it, putting up with you, knowing that even if you go back on your word every time you look at me you’re going to know that I’ve seen you like _this._ ” Another thrust, slow and he gasped raggedly. “That I’ve had you on your knees begging to eat me out. You make these great noises when I fuck you, too-”

His whole body was throbbing. He was right on the edge, hovering near to sliding over, body pulsing. He tried to grind back against her but she was pressed to tightly against him and he only managed to make his guts ache with the unforgiving push of her cock inside. He panted. “Natasha,” he said, and wanted to snatch it back a moment later. 

“Getting a little familiar,” she said, and then her hands ran up his spine, a parody of a caress against the way she rocked her hips against him in a way that made him want to scream. He choked it back. “Go ahead. You can say it if you want. _Natasha, please._ ” Her voice was a cruel mimicry of his, and he could feel himself shuddering, trying to hold it in. She moved again, a slow pull out and then back in and right across his prostate and he couldn’t-

“Please-!” he burst out, and one of her hands slid under his hips, brushed her thumb across the base of his cock. 

He bit his own arm so he didn’t make a sound as he came in pulses on her floor, his eyes rolling back, pure relief flooding him until his head was spinning. 

He slumped limply into his own mess as it ebbed, and only realized gradually that she was still buried inside him, but that she was doing something, shifting enough to make him want to whine again with the way it made the thing inside him move. It was only when she drew back but the feeling of fullness remained that he understood, vaguely, that she was going to leave it in him. 

A vague sound not quite a whimper escaped him before he could hold it back. His body was already throbbing. 

“I didn’t ask your opinion,” Romanova said, with perfect brutality. “I’m not done with you.” Oh, that sent shivers down his spine. She was stepping around in front of him, now, and he lifted his head to look at her. Her hair was slightly darkened by sweat, and her eyes were bright. Gleaming. She crouched down in front of him, and her fingers were back in his hair. Loki’s eyes closed without meaning to, leaning unconsciously into that touch, and he heard her hum, something like amusement, before she let go.

“Time to put that mouth to good use again,” she said. “If you’re going to make this worth my while…” 

“If you’re not careful,” he pushed out, making his voice stronger than he felt, “I might start to think – you like the things _I_ do to _you._ ”

Romanova shrugged as she settled back, legs open on either side of his head, thighs already glistening with moisture. “Go ahead,” she said, sounding unconcerned. “Saves me a little effort,” and he wanted to shiver. Callous. Careless. Not even just a body or an enemy, but even less. 

Loki swallowed hard and turned his head to lick at the sheen already on her thighs. He felt her muscles flex under his lips and let his eyes flutter closed as she shifted forward. He licked at her, hands rising to rest on her legs. He let his tongue flicker over soft flesh, and her hips tilted slightly, making it easier and she was playing at something but-

Loki yelped into her cunt, his whole body jumping as the false cock in his ass buzzed like a low frequency hum, then was still. His body clenched, his tongue stilling. Her fingernails dug into his scalp. “Pay attention,” she said, lowly, and then it was vibrating again, and this time it didn’t stop, coming in pulses, and his body jumped with every one, he could feel himself getting hard again-

The vibrations spiked suddenly, and he felt like he was going to shake apart and almost howled, stimulation building and building and- “I’m half tempted,” he realized Natasha was saying, somewhere, “To just leave you here like this for a few hours. Make myself dinner. Watch a movie. By the time I came back around you’d be _begging_ for it to stop.” The vibrations slowed again, and he ground desperately against the floor, needing friction, a touch, something, everything in his body humming at that frequency. It was already almost too much and she’d barely begun. Her fingers pulled out of his hair. “How would you like that?” 

He moved his tongue frantically, found her clit and ran his tongue over it. His jaw was starting to ache but his thoughts were a spin of need-want-need that kept him going, and all the while those vibrations running from his ass up his spine, through his intestines, pulsing inside him and pushing him with an almost cramping sensation toward another climax. His world was tunneling rapidly toward the taste and smell of her sex and the irregular pulsing seated deep in his own body so there was hardly room for him between the two-

Orgasm tore through him again like wind through wet paper. His nails gouged into the floor but he would not scream, would _not_ scream, would not-

Her hand fisted in his hair again, tugging until he felt a few hairs tear loose. “Come on,” she said, ruthless. “It’s almost _embarrassing,_ how easy you are. I almost feel _sorry_ for you, how much you need to submit under all that _bravado._ Is there anything I could do you wouldn’t come back for more?” 

A sound strangled in Loki’s throat, and he worked his tongue, his body still writhing. His cock hadn’t even softened after he’d come, that _thing_ in his ass still sending pulse after pulse through him, up into his intestines, down through his cock, thrumming through his groin and he could only squirm and pant for air, riding the edge of pleasure so intense it became pain. 

He tried to use his tongue, to take control and give back to her what she was doing to him, but his focus kept falling apart and he was rapidly reduced to just gasping into her cunt and letting her do the work, his own hips moving in helpless, fruitless little jerks, chest squeezing tight and he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t do _anything-_

Loki’s nerves felt like they were exploding all along his spine. He could just feel her nails digging into his shoulders, and the world blinked out of existence, his mind surrendering. 

When thought returned, he realized gradually that she had moved away. He forced his head to lift from where he was slumped on the floor and found her sitting on the couch, posture relaxed, watching him like some particularly amusing specimen. He couldn’t summon the energy – or, really, the desire - to glare. His ass felt loose, aching faintly, but most of his body was still buzzing too much for him to really notice.

He breathed raggedly, in and out, trying to collect the scattered pieces of himself from where they’d flaked off. It was too much. She was going to push too far. 

(Loki needed her to.)

He would crawl to her, if he thought he could move. Crawl on his _knees_ and rest his head on her lap and take whatever scraps of affection she would give. Or whatever scraps of hatred. It didn’t matter. 

“Is that all?” The words spilled from his mouth as he was yet quivering through the aftershocks, even as some still reasonable corner of his mind screamed for him to keep his damn mouth shut. 

“Not even close,” she said, and stretched. “I was thinking about calling it good, but if you’re going to be like that…”

“What, then,” Loki pushed out, his heartbeat picking up. “More with your little toy?” 

“Mmm.” She sat forward, just a little. “It’s got one more thing to show you, yeah.”

Loki widened his eyes, made his expression deliberately curious as he started to push himself a little bit up. “What’s that?” He asked, with an air of casual carelessness, as though the answer didn’t really matter. 

“You’ll see.” He tensed, slightly, at the tone of the Widow’s voice. Then he heard the click of a switch. For a moment it was just a mild tingle on his skin, and then-

His senses exploded. It was lightning, crackling through him, spidering through his entrails and over his skin, lighting his blood on fire. The scream exploded from his throat, she’d shoved a storm inside him and it was going to consume him from the inside-

His cock was painfully hard, but the rigid _thing_ inside him had no give to let him grind into the floor. The lightning let up and his body slumped, quivering as he panted for air. His muscles spasmed out of control, and all his words had fled. 

“Too much?” Her voice was almost gentle, and he wanted to scream. “I can dial it back a notch.” _Yes_ , he wanted to sob, but also _again_ because _too much_ was just enough. After a moment of silence marked only by his heaving breaths, she rose and came over to give his flank a sharp slap. “Over. I want to see your face when you fall apart with this-” she gave the thing in him a twist and he squirmed with a sharp hiss at the drag – “up your ass.”

The thought to disobey was only a moment. He rolled over. Maybe she would take him in hand, wring him dry. He caught one glimpse of her face, a predatory smile, eyes intent. “Good boy,” she said, and this time he saw her flick the switch. 

He arched off the floor with his eyes slammed closed, electricity stroking and scratching his insides like fingernails, body twitching heedless of his commands. He flashed from pleasure to pain to pleasure too quickly to distinguish, everything building and blending inside him, and then she twisted the device so he _felt_ it nudge his prostate and he was gone, nerves screaming protest as he came, still convulsing. 

The world whited out. When it came back, the lightning was gone, a quiet buzz in his body all that remained. Loki blinked, dazed, his thoughts feeling sluggish and dulled. “Nnnh,” he heart in his own voice, and shook his head, trying to focus. 

Natasha was leaning back on the sofa again, her legs spread and fingers sliding with slick sounds through her folds. He managed to hold back a whine. 

She looked up and appeared to remember that he was there. “Oh good,” she said, casually. “You’re back.” She plucked something off the couch, ran her thumb over it. “Ready?” He recognized it, but not quickly enough. 

“Aaa- _aaaah_ -” The breath felt like it had been punched out of him, and it was too much, far too much, exquisite agony on already abused skin. His heart raced, pounding like it might escape his ribs and he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t _breathe_ – he threw back his head, body bending until his spine ached. He _would_ kill her for this, crush every bone in her body-

His treacherous cock was hard again, even as he sucked in air that didn’t seem to reach his lungs. She was going to wring another orgasm from him without a single touch, and the knowledge both aroused and humiliated him as pulses of lightning rolled up his spine and down his cock. He was pounding with it, his blood buzzing with it and his body was going to rupture and burst open and-

She didn’t turn it off this time when he came, and it _hurt_ like knives stabbing into his gut but it didn’t matter, he couldn’t think anymore, couldn’t do anything but ride it and hardly care if he died, doubted he would even realize until it was done. Every sense was overwhelmed, unable to process anything, to form even the slightest of words, even to understand what the Widow’s device was doing inside him anymore except that it was terrible and awful and so _good._ He was cresting a third time, and he didn’t think he could make it through again, there was nothing left to give up but he needed to, needed to-

Her hand wrapped around his cock and squeezed and pleasurable agony incinerated the last of his thoughts. He didn’t realize he was screaming until his throat started to go raw.

Then everything was gone. 

* * *

It might have been an hour, or a week, or a year, before he could drag himself back together, gather his thoughts from scattered corners and assemble his mind again, and even then he still felt fractured, utterly broken open, entirely taken apart. He was flayed nerve, hardly able to do so much as twitch.

He thought he’d never felt so good. 

He opened his eyes very slowly and looked up at Romanova, on her feet. She pushed at his shoulder with one foot, her expression cool again. He blinked at her owlishly, still not quite able to form words. She smiled, very slightly, and then crouched down. “Looking a little dazed,” she murmured. “You done?” 

_No,_ he wanted to say, but then she moved and her foot nudged his cock and he almost wanted to scream again. “Yes,” he forced out. “Yes, aah-”

She drew back, and he panted in relief. “Good,” she said, “Cause I took care of myself when you weren’t paying attention.” She didn’t _sound_ displeased, but Loki felt a faint shudder run down his spine anyway. He felt empty, drained, burned out, and an alarming part of him wanted to crawl into her arms and sleep. 

“I’ll – have to make that up to you,” he managed, his voice hoarse, words trickling back to him slowly.

“Hmmm-m.” The Widow paused, and looked down at him again, her expression revealing nothing. “How long do you think you’re going to need? Because I’m going to want my floor back.” 

Callous. Careless. A business transaction, nothing more, for her – a way of keeping her world and her friends safe, perhaps. _I’ll change that,_ he thought, _I’ll bind her to me,_ but he already knew it wouldn’t change. He needed her. He was already an addict, and there was nothing she could do that he wouldn’t lap up and come crawling back for more. He took a ragged breath and it sounded like a sob.

Loki closed his eyes and hated himself, knowing he’d be returning soon.


End file.
